Wow I was trying to be nice, I'm like... the nice boss, who cares about your feelings and shit. Can't I pay someone to get me health insurance? Like... what's my social?
You really need to stop going to motels, Boss. We can just cuddle at your place.
We can do whatever you want! You make the rules.
My life isn't really falling apart. You'll learn this is actually pretty common. But yeah, we need to put your life together properly. You can't really run around getting drunk, high, or whatever else you do in your free time if you want to take your place as a real leader.
Yeah but that's something more exciting about cuddling in a motel, feels like we're doing something naughty.
...I guess I do. But do you like going shopping?
Okay Theo stop getting yourself put in the hospital, that's an order. Who said I spend all my time drunk and high huh maybe i'm just drinking a lot of coffee and working on my novel.
Okay I'm just gonna tell you one thing- I don't want to fuck you, sweetie :P I mean yeah you're cute and yes I apparently enjoy cuddling you but that's as far as it goes.
...okay then I'm taking you shopping... where we will pay for things instead of stealing things. Unless we feel like stealing things.
Like always always? I don't need to comp your psych bills?
You're proud of me for threatening you. That's it, we need to step up our lessons, you're meant to feel scared or something. I mean, I know its you so scared is a tall order, but I wanted you to maybe get nauseous at least.
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...I don't even have health insurance how the hell am I gonna work on a benefits package.
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We should work on that.
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Can't I pay someone to get me health insurance?
Like... what's my social?
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Yeah. Or I could help you get it. No paying required.
You're hopeless. If you bring that blue lock box I put under your bed, I can work on all that for you while I'm sitting in this hospital bed.
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Okay you could do it and I'll take you shopping?? Is that something we do?
Really? we're getting my life together while yours falls apart? [Jasper is probably either drunk or high rn with this activity going on.]
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We can do whatever you want! You make the rules.
My life isn't really falling apart. You'll learn this is actually pretty common. But yeah, we need to put your life together properly. You can't really run around getting drunk, high, or whatever else you do in your free time if you want to take your place as a real leader.
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...I guess I do. But do you like going shopping?
Okay Theo stop getting yourself put in the hospital, that's an order.
Who said I spend all my time drunk and high huh maybe i'm just drinking a lot of coffee and working on my novel.
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Yeah, of course I do! Especially the book store. And the gun shop. I don't go there often, though.
I'll do my best, thief's honor.
You don't really strike me as the novel writing type.
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...okay then I'm taking you shopping... where we will pay for things instead of stealing things.
Unless we feel like stealing things.
Its a really interesting novel.
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Yeah, okay! That sounds like a plan.
Really? What's it about?
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Its the best plan I can come up with right now.
Its about... the employee who asked too many questions. It has a really bad ending.
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Really? Does someone die?
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Someone dies. Horribly. Spoiler: its the employee.
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Wow, now I can't read your book, Boss!
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Why? I mean its only a book.
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Finding out what happens is the best part of the book!
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hah. keep going and you'll have no problem finding out.
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I feel like you're threatening me. If you are, I don't think I've ever been more proud of you than I am in this moment.
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You're proud of me for threatening you. That's it, we need to step up our lessons, you're meant to feel scared or something. I mean, I know its you so scared is a tall order, but I wanted you to maybe get nauseous at least.
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We'll work on it, promise. One day, you'll make me tremble in my boots.
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You should be trembling in your boots right now man, I'm totally scary. [Except he wasn't really all that scary at the end of the day.]